I’ve been forced into a new relationship with a beauty therapist for not so regular lady maintenance when I know the woolly mammoth look wont go down too well at swim lessons with my daughter.
My regular lady has gone to work overseas for an indefinite period and I was introduced to her replacement, Emily.
She left me to undress and there was no offer of a paper g-string. “Hmmm…” I thought. I know they mostly find those things annoying, but they do at least give you the appearance of a bit of modesty even though we both know we’re not kidding anyone. So I hopped up on the table, nekkid from the waist down.
Emily said “Ok, just going to do your legs” and proceeded at a lightning fast pace, chatting the entire time and before I knew it she said “Ok, let’s get that g-string done. Now, could you bend one knee up to your other knee and turn it outwardsflat on the table? Great! Now the other one? Exactly the same? Here we go!”
Hey???
After childbirth I had lost all sense of modesty. Care factor was zilch. But it’s been just over three years now and laying frog legged in front of the gorgeous 22 year old immaculate Maltese goddess, gave me cause to hesitate.
And yeah, the hesitation was over in 3 seconds by which point she’d practically covered the entire thing with wax and was nearly done. A vadge is a vadge is a vadge, I guess.
I distracted myself by talking passionately about some sort of nonsense as she ripped off the usual parts that have never caused me pain, but then she tore something that made my eyes cross and I looked down to be confronted with something I haven’t seen since I was 12. I had to sit up to see that she’d literally left only a tiny heart shaped box of fuzz but visible only from the underside. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t felt her spread the wax on the top. After a deep intake of air I breathed “AAAHHHH…I don’t usually get THAT done???”
She just smiled and said ” You’ll have to get a Brazilian next time! That part’s the worst part – and you didn’t even flinch!”
I vaguely indulged her but I’ve previously written about the subject here a few years ago now and thoughts have not changed.
Bush may be gone, but in some parts it’s still popular.
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I’ve been anti-Bush for quite a while now.
I’m intrigued by the idea of paper g-strings. Imagine working in the factory that makes those…
brave soul. It is and always will be Veet for me.